Loving The Enemy

From Tricycle:

Loving the Enemy


This Buddhist practice is as necessary as it is difficult. With teachings by Jeffrey Hopkins, the Dalai Lama, Master Sheng-yen, Pema Chodron, and Thich Nhat Hanh



One of the most challenging practices in Buddhism is that of loving the enemy. However counterintuitive and difficult the practice may seem, nothing is more fundamental to the teachings; it is precisely what Buddhism asks of us, again and again. In the following section, teachers from several traditions give their thoughts on this cornerstone practice.



Nonopposition

Master Sheng-yen challenges us to accept adversity without resistance.



Although everyone has the potential for compassion, some people seem to be our enemies. How should we react to them? Shakyamuni Buddha encountered many people who wanted to harm him during his life, but he was never angry with them, nor did he try to overpower or dominate them. Instead he treated them compassionately and tried to help them. Both Buddhism in general and Ch’an [Chinese Zen] in particular condemn fighting and advocate nonopposition to one’s enemies. A true practitioner responds with nonopposition to obstructions caused by people, situations, and the environment, and lets go of any tension she may feel. She does not resist or fight with difficulties.



What is nonopposition? If someone treats you maliciously, do not fight with her. Instead, do everything in your power to peacefully avoid a confrontation. Even if she punches you, don’t fight back. Abandon any thought of retaliation. Do not even hope that she doesn’t hit you again. Such a hope is vain and unprofitable. Simply accept adversity without resistance. Do not become annoyed when faced with difficulties. To do so merely adds difficulty to difficulty and further disturbs your mind. By maintaining a mind of peace and nonopposition, difficulties will naturally fall away.



If treated with compassion, those who seem to be our enemies can take up the dharma and become compassionate. We are all able to become compassionate because our negative nature is not fixed. It is impermanent and empty, like all phenomena. It is because of greed, hatred, and ignorance that beings manifest actions that are harmful to others.



Master Sheng-yen is the resident teacher at the Ch’an Meditation Center in New York, which he founded in 1977, as well as the abbot of two monasteries in Taipei. From Subtle Wisdom: Understanding Suffering, Cultivating Compasson Through Ch’an Buddhism by Master Sheng-yen. ©1999 by Dharma Drum Publications. Published by Doubleday Books.



The Enemy Within

The Dalai Lama on why the inner enemy is the most dangerous one



Our history abounds with stories of individuals perpetrating the most destructive and harmful acts: killing and torture, bringing misery and untold suffering to large numbers of people. These incidents in human history can be seen as reflecting the darker side of our common human heritage. These events occur only when there is hatred, anger, jealousy, and unbounded greed. World history is a record of the effects of the negative and positive thoughts of human beings. This, I think, is quite clear. By reflecting on these past occurrences, we can see that if we want to have a better and happier future, now is the time to examine the mindset of our present generation and to reflect on the way of life that it may bring about in the future. The pervasive power of these negative attitudes cannot be overstated.



Despite being a monk and a supposed practitioner of the Bodhicaryavatara [“The Way of the Bodhisattva”], I myself still occasionally become irritated and angry and, as a result, use harsh words toward others. Then, a few moments later when the anger has subsided, I feel embarrassed; the negative words are already spoken, and there is truly no way to take them back. Although the words themselves are uttered, and the sound of the voice has ceased to exist, their impact still lives on. Hence, the only thing I can do is to go to the person and apologize, isn’t that right? But in the meantime, one feels quite shy and embarrassed. This shows that even a short instance of anger and irritation creates a great amount of discomfort and disturbance to the agent, not to mention the harm caused to the person who is the target of that anger. So in reality, these negative states of mind obscure our intelligence and judgment and, in this way, cause great damage.



One of the best human qualities is our intelligence, which enables us to judge what is wholesome and what is unwholesome, what is beneficial and what is harmful. Negative thoughts, such as anger and strong attachment, destroy this special human quality; this is indeed very sad. When anger or attachment dominates the mind, a person becomes almost crazed, and I am certain that nobody wishes to be crazy. Under their power we commit all kinds of acts - often having far-reaching and destructive consequences. A person gripped by such states of mind and emotion is like a blind person, who cannot see where he is going. Yet we neglect to challenge these negative thoughts and emotions that lead to near insanity. On the contrary, we often nurture and reinforce them! By doing so we are, in fact, making ourselves prey to their destructive power. When you reflect along these lines, you will realize that our true enemy is not outside ourselves.



Let me give you another example. When your mind is trained in self-discipline, even if you are surrounded by hostile forces, your peace of mind will hardly be disturbed. On the other hand, your mental peace and calm can easily be disrupted by your own negative thoughts and emotions. So I repeat, the real enemy is within, not outside. Usually we define our enemy as a person, an external agent, whom we believe is causing harm to us or to someone we hold dear. But such an enemy is relative and impermanent. One moment, the person may act as an enemy; at yet another moment, he or she may become your best friend. This is a truth that we often experience in our own lives. But negative thoughts and emotions, the inner enemy, will always remain the enemy. They are your enemy today, they have been your enemy in the past, and they will remain your enemy in the future as long as they reside within your mental continuum. Therefore, Shantideva says that negative thoughts and emotions are the real enemy, and this enemy is within.



This inner enemy is extremely dangerous. The destructive potential of an external enemy is limited compared to that of its inner counterpart. Moreover, it is often possible to create a physical defense against an external enemy. In the past, for example, even though they had limited material resources and technological capabilities, people defended themselves by building fortresses and castles with many tiers and layers of walls. In today’s nuclear age, such defenses as castles and fortresses are obsolete. In a time when every country is a potential target for the nuclear weapons of others, human beings still continue to develop defense systems of greater and greater sophistication. The strategic defense project initiated by the United States, widely known as “Star Wars,” is a typical example of such a defense system. Underlying its development is still the old belief that we can eventually create a system that will provide us with the “ultimate” protection. I do not know if it will ever be possible to create a defense system capable of guaranteeing worldwide protection against all external forces of destruction. However, one thing is certain: as long as those destructive internal enemies are left to themselves, unchallenged, the threat of physical annihilation will always loom over us. In fact, the destructive power of an external enemy ultimately derives from the power of these internal forces. The inner enemy is the trigger that unleashes the destructive power of the external enemy.



His Holiness the Fourteenth Dalai Lama’s most recent title is Essence of the Heart Sutra (Wisdom). From The World of Tibetan Buddhism, � 1995 by Tenzin Gyatso, the Fourteenth Dalai Lama; English translation ©1995 by Geshe Thupten Jinpa. Reprinted with permission of Wisdom Publications.



The General and the Abbot

When a rebel army took over a Korean town, all fled the Zen temple except the abbot. The rebel general burst into the temple and was incensed to find that the master refused to greet him, let alone receive him as a conqueror.



“Don’t you know,” shouted the general, “that you are looking at one who can run you through without batting an eye?”



“And you,” said the abbot, “are looking at one who can be run through without batting an eye!”



The general’s scowl turned into a smile. He bowed and left the temple.



From Zen Poems of China and Japan: The Crane’s Bill, ©1973 by Lucien Stryk, Takashi Ikemoto, and Taigan Takayama. Published by Anchor Books.



Tonglen



Tonglen is the Tibetan practice of “sending and receiving.” Tong means “sending out” or “letting go”; len means “receiving” or “accepting.” Tonglen is ordinarily practiced in sitting meditation, using the breath. Put simply, the practitioner breathes in the bad and breathes out the good, taking on the suffering of other sentient beings. At first the practice may appear self-defeating, but as the late Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche said, “The more negativity we take in with a sense of openness and compassion, the more goodness there is to breathe out. So there is nothing to lose.”



Tonglen on the Spot Pema Chodron reveals how tonglen - the Tibetan practice of “sending and receiving” - can be put to use in everyday situations.



his practice is really the essence of the tonglen approach. Because I have found it very helpful for myself, I like to recommend it to all my students. Even if you choose not to do the formal tonglen practice, you can always do this on-the-spot practice. Once you get used to it and practice it regularly, it will make formal tonglen practice more real and meaningful to you.



This is a practice that you can do for a real-life situation. Whenever you meet a situation that awakens your compassion or that is painful and difficult for you, you can stop for a moment, breathe in any suffering that you see, and breathe out a sense of relief. It is a simple and direct process. Unlike the formal practice, it does not involve any visualizations or steps. It’s a simple and natural exchange: you see suffering, you take it in with the inbreath, you send out relief with the outbreath.



For example, you might be in the supermarket and see a mother slapping her little girl. It is painful for you to see, but there is really nothing you can say or do at that moment.



Your first reaction might be to turn away out of fear and try to forget it. But in this practice, instead of turning away, you could actually start to do tonglen for the little girl who is crying and also for the angry mother who has reached the end of her rope. You can send out a general sense of relaxation and openness, or something specific, like a hug or a kind word, or whatever feels right to you at the moment. It’s not all that conceptual; it’s almost spontaneous. When you contact a painful situation in this way and stay with it, it can open up your heart and become the source of compassion.



You can do tonglen on the spot when strong emotions come up and you don’t know what to do with them. For example, you might be having a painful argument with your spouse or your boss at work. They are yelling at you, and you don’t know how to react. So you can start to breathe in the painful feelings and send out a sense of spaciousness and relaxation with the outbreath - for yourself, for the person who is yelling at you, and for all the other people who are dealing with a similarly difficult situation. Of course, at some point you have to react to the person who is yelling at you, but by introducing some space and warmth into the situation, you will probably deal with it more skillfully.



You can also do this practice when you feel some blockage to opening and developing compassion. For example, you see a homeless person on the street who is asking you for money and seems to be an alcoholic. In spite of your desire to be compassionate, you can’t help but turn away and feel disgust or resentment. At that point, you can start doing tonglen for yourself and all the other people who want to be open but are basically shut down. You breathe in the feeling of shut-downness, your own and everybody else’s. Then you send out a sense of space or relaxation or letting go. When you feel blocked, that’s not an obstacle to tonglen; it’s part of the practice. You work with what feels like blockage as the seed of awakening in your heart and as connection with other people.



Pema Chodron, an American Buddhist nun, is a founding member and resident teacher at Gampo Abbey, in Cape Breton, Nova Scotia, the first Tibetan Buddhist monastery in North America for Westerners. From Tonglen, The Path of Transformation, © 2001 by Pema Chodron, edited by Tingdzin Otro. Reprinted with permission of Vajradhatu Publications, www.shambhalashop.com.